I am fascinated by Acting, Directing, Producing, Screenplays

I am not a fresh 22 year old college graduate. I'm supposed to be thinking of wrapping things up, but I can't stop playing with new things like acting and poetry and volunteering to direct and reminiscing about producing and looking excitedly at my horrid attempts at film writing. What is this? I still wish I could feel more comfortable and excited by people, but in a Schmooze situation today, I decided I was too tired to risk a Schmooze with new Theater people. I would not leave a good impression. And I'm wondering, if I fail in the theater, will I avoid bitterness? What is the point of being in the Arts if one is left with bitterness? Or do I just say that because I have an income and savings and can take the time and leisure to do this? I could and probably will fail at these new interests and that's all right. I am starting to remember the pleasure principal of creation. Yes, having money helps, but I would like recognition. Even Shakespeare didn't know he was Shakespeare while he was alive and what a bummer! Can I be the Grandma Moses of theater. No. I am just not that adorable. I can be a real pain in the ass and as we go into the more political "Bulldog",  I plan to.  To paraphrase a line from "Rent:", today is the only day we have.