Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Aging with a Final Laugh

Aging with a Final Laugh
By Susan B. Reinhard, Copyright 2012

A man and a woman can make a child
By dropping into bed
Remembering how humans once were wild
Sans the use of the head

I’ve reached the age where I am free of sex
A woman has no choice
Lucky I had one spectacular ex
No, I won’t hush my voice

To any of my wants and lusts and needs
Even a Facebook poke
Is wrong because my garden has no seeds
A Playboy Grandma joke

But thank you for showing me sex’s slaves
Who think of little more
Than turning their beds into joyless graves
Where it all seems a bore

I know that wounds caused this situation
And they are not to blame
But let me find other inspiration
And Arts to fire my flame

Think first of the Earth and starving children
Put my life in order
Think hard on this pivotal election
Don’t be such a hoarder

Refuse to waste money on makeup and dye
Don’t waste money on rags
Don’t attempt to catch a man with a lie
Laugh at the lines and sags

Fat old redheads without money or height
Can somehow be a Queen
And thrive alone with just one simple rule:
“Replace man with machine”


  1. could u have stuck to the sex parts- dave, durty in baltimore

    1. I was thinking that it should have been raunchier, but I do have my Little old lady image to maintain.

  2. Joe Brownrigg, facebookJanuary 11, 2012 at 3:50 PM

    You ARE a good dirty old woman!
    And I admit to being a good dirty old man!
    So? ;-)
    I know your machine, but it can never fully replace a man ... or woman!!!

  3. I didn't put the Multiple Sclerosis into the mix. Trying to keep it more universal. I am used to being on my own and I can't even find the machine any more! But it was all written for the joke.